Imagine a reality where apps like Uber Eats and Netflix are telling you what to eat and what to watch in order to support the existence of Black Lives because God forbid you’re in the mood for sushi or you want to buy a dress from a store that just happens to be owned by an Asian lady… Oh, wait, it’s 2020 – you don’t need to imagine it; you’re there. If you’re not out on the streets, screaming “Black Lives Matter”, painting the sidewalks and most importantly stamping the BLM logo on your profile picture, you’re racist.
But let’s not get into specifics just yet.
“Girlfriends” recently popped up on my Netflix’ Suggested List – an old sitcom about four women friends, going through life, doing their thang, etc; much like any other sitcom from the 2000’s. I’m not gonna lie, I was slightly annoyed at first. In today’s world, it’s not just a show; it’s a show that Netflix feels is necessary for you to “re-visit” because all of a sudden we’re living in a racist society. Like, stop pushing your bullshit agenda on me, Netflix. I get enough of that from Facebook on the daily. But then Netflix was all like, come on, you’ve already seen it; what’s it to ya? Just sit your ass on the couch; grab yourself some popcorn or fried chicken or whatever and tune all the way in; educate yourself on some black culture and whatnot. What’s the harm, really? So I took the bait and clicked play. Boy, am I glad I did! “Girlfriends” is even more relevant TODAY, with everything that’s going on, than it was 20 years ago.
Okay, now let’s talk specifics.
- LAWYER STUFF.
Joan, a very capable and knowledgeable, young Black Woman keeps getting talked over in the meetings by the big, bad White CEO and other white, male members of the firm. Every time she opens her mouth, someone else trumps her (pun intended) by mentioning a shiny jaguar in the garage or something else irrelevant to the case at hand… Poor Joan – a woman in a man’s world. Scratch that, a black woman, in a white man’s world. But here’s the kicker! William, the only other black attorney in the firm, takes the stage at some point and proposes the same idea she was about to propose; and gets praised for it. Naturally, after the fact, Joan’s all pissed off. She’s like, “William, how could you??? We’re the only two black people in this firm; it’s hard enough as it is, and now you had to go and stab me in the back on top of it; stole my idea; said it first; ripped it out from under me, etc…” to which, William *brilliantly* replies with a whole speech about how she shouldn’t make it into a race thing… He tells her that he, just like she, has earned his right to be in that room. He tells her that everyone in that room, regardless of race and/or sex is a shark; everyone is out for themselves. He continues to explain to her that perhaps the reason she is overlooked is not because she is a woman or that she is black, but because she is somewhat timid during these meetings and quite frankly overall uptight. “Lighten up, Joan”, he tells her. “People might take you more seriously.”
I’m telling you now, hands down, William is the best character in the show; from the beginning and all the way through.
Don’t make it into a race issue!!! Your choices define you. Stop blaming others for your misfortunes and take responsibility for your actions, and inactions. Take control over your own life and work to make it better. You have the freedom to do that – you live in America. - MORE LAWYER STUFF.
I may or may not be mistaken on the technicalities of the actual position because I may or may not have been drunk whilst watching these particular episodes… But basically, there was a big promotion up in the air, and our beloved William didn’t get it. He almost took Joan’s route and got all irrational about it, pulling the race card and all; just to be stopped cold with the harsh but very necessary reality, from his superior. “It has nothing to do with the fact that you’re black. It has everything to do with the fact that you’ve gone soft. You used to have a spark! You had a fire! Now you’re just… Meh.”
(I’m sure Joan influenced the “meh” but I digress…)
Again, the moral of the story is: quit blaming others for your misfortunes. Don’t like the outcome of something? Feel like the world is against you because of things you can not control? Chances are you’re wrong. Adjust. Be better. - GET A JOB!
Lynn – The Notorious Moocher throughout the show, who happens to be half-black (Abandoning – Father) and half-white (Bipolar, Abandoning Mother); adopted by two white folks that were more than willing to pay for her 8 College degrees; but not so willing to ever tell her “NO” … Several years later, she’s wandering through life, trying to find herself, yada yada yada. At some point, Lynn meets this dude named Vosco, overseas somewhere, and they fall in love. It’s not uncommon for Lynn, because she’s all spiritual and what not; and he’s so very special and whatnot; they obvs belong together. She brings him back to the states and whoops, months later, after hiding in Joan’s place, surprise surprise, he’s just another “CHASING-THE-DREAM- don’t-wanna-do-nothing-LOSER”… They end up living in some garage? And she’s all mad at him for being a mooch? Meanwhile he’s upset with her for not being there for him and his dreams but only caring about the material things? Talk about irony… The whole thing is fucked.
Moral of the story: Get a freaking job! Contribute to society. Don’t be a useless turd; taking advantage of everyone around you, your entire adolescence, and then getting mad at the world when all of a sudden shit doesn’t just land in your lap like you’re used to. You’re literally that child that throws a temper tantrum in a supermarket and STILL gets the lollipop, because your parents would rather shut you up than teach you valuable lessons about life. Oh but wait, “Lynn was adopted, she didn’t have parents” — Shut up! Stop making excuses! Adoptive parents, birth parents, no parents – no matter how shitty or golden your situation is growing up, your choices are entirely your own. - ELLIS – THE “BLACK” ACTOR
Joan starts dating this guy. His name is Ellis. Much like many romances, theirs starts out from instantaneous admiration followed by immediate hatred; followed by months of back and forth drama. It was kind of annoying to watch to be perfectly honest. Nevermind their relationship though; let’s talk about one tiny little factor revolving his acting career. At one point he’s super upset about being seen as a sell-out; he hides under the blankets, refusing to come out because he thinks that his black followers had given up on him… Because he had accepted a role in a Hollywood film or something, to uproot his career? And an appropriate response to that from his fellow black folk is apparently to publicly shame him via shitty stand-up and live performances?… Like okay, y’all are upset that you’re not getting anywhere with your “art”, so you’re lashing out, cool. Whatever. Wish Ellis could see it that way, but instead he’s all like boo hoo, my people hate me. Give me a break. You’re an actor. Act. Accept the role/ whatever. Do you! All that sell-out talk is bullshit. Oh but get this, Maya (personally, my least favorite character in the show) tells him that he’s right for feeling ashamed. She goes: Remember that one time, you went on E-entertainment and you were all like, I wanna be referred to as An Actor, not A Black Actor; like what’s so wrong with being a black actor in the first place.
Interesting. A black actor wants to be referred to as just an actor, because in his opinion, it doesn’t matter what color his skin is when it comes to what he does for a living; it shouldn’t be included in his job title. Somehow that makes him racist against his own people? I’m sorry, what the actual fuck? I’m a bartender. Should I be putting “White Bartender” on my resume instead? That doesn’t sound just a little ridiculous to you? Or should we only include the black distinction when it comes to prestigious jobs like Actor, Doctor, Attorney? Ben Shapiro said it best.
“You’re not upset because you’re treated differently. You’re upset because you aren’t.” — Let that sink in. - VICTIM MENTALITY.
Maya… Maya cheats on her husband. Maya is super sorry, but the hubby wants a divorce. Maya runs into Tasha; a single mom with a so called deadbeat ex-husband. Tasha instantly becomes Maya’s friend because, oh my god, so much in common… “Your other girlfriends can never understand what you’re going through… Your other girlfriends have never been through what I’ve been through and what you’re going through… Your other girlfriends blah blah blah. Your ex-husband and his new girlfriend are blah blah blah. Everyone is to blame for your misfortunes, you’re the VICTIM; Giiiirl, let me hook you up with some free cable and let me tell you what’s up about The System. Blah. Blah. Blah.”
Next thing you know, Maya is all up in arms, acting like she’s not getting what she “deserves” from the soon to be ex-husband; demanding this and threatening with that. Bitch! You cheated. He left you. Take some responsibility. The separation is YOUR fault. You’re making yourself out to look like a victim, when you AIN’T. As a FATHER, he’s still doing everything he’s supposed to and then some, so calm your delusional titties.
Guess what? Tasha is trash. It becomes clear when you see how she treats her Ex, who clearly just wants to be a part of their kids’ lives and she pulls some BS about how she’s “Got it covered”. Thankfully, it doesn’t just become clear to the audience, but to Maya as well.
Takeaway: Nobody owes you shit. Especially so if your behavior is shit. - FRIENDS.
Joan & Toni – Friends for years. They have one of those relationships that strikes you as odd at first because they’re completely different people, but then you just kinda shrug it off because, who cares? So what if one person is neurotic and the other is selfish? They’ve been through thick and thin and back again; what are they gonna do, just end it because they have nothing in common?
Several seasons in; events have transpired; Joan basically breaks up with Toni. It’s very traumatic. It wasn’t a blow up kind of breakup. There was no “Big Fight”. She’s just over it – Nothing left to explain, nothing left to talk about; just Done.
So they go on about their lives for a little while… Shock; resentment; anger; indifference; remorse; more anger; more remorse; more indifference; etc.
Fast forward to a moment that takes place in Church. Toni approaches Joan during service and practically begs for forgiveness. Not that there was anything to be forgiven for… Like I said, it wasn’t anything terribly specific that broke them up in the first place. But nonetheless, there she is, begging Joan to “take her back”. And Joan is just like ‘I’m sorry, I can’t. Appreciate you going out of your way like this; I know this was hard for you; but I’m just not about it anymore’
Heartless Joan, am I right? Can’t you just swallow whatever grudge you have and move on? This person is clearly coming to you with open arms and you’re just… Meh. What kind of person are you anyway, if you turn away a person in need?
Now… If you’re not religious, that’s cool; but don’t let the following concept be lost on you. Also, keep in mind that everybody that does believe in God, does so differently. This is a black church. So they sing, and they’re loud and they’re all Halleluyah and whatnot. Now that you’ve got a picture in your head, picture this: The preacher goes on stage and starts talking about how we’re all God’s children and how we’re all human and we make mistakes. He says that as long as you genuinely seek forgiveness you will be forgiven by the Lord. Toni gets up and walks up to the stage, silently, eyes closed, asking for forgiveness from The Lord. Joan, seeing this, follows the notion, walks up there and holds her hand. Just like that, whatever anger or resentment was between them, disappears.
What happens if one friend believes in God and the other one doesn’t? The Church Scene would never happen and is therefore obsolete. So you’re just left with ‘I’ll remember you fondly; it was fun while it lasted’. People grow apart. Maybe you’ll find your way back to one another; maybe you won’t. Such is Life. - LOVE.
Toni – a tall, black woman, having become professionally successful is looking for love; preferably with a similarly successful, tall black man. Who knew she would instead fall in love with a white, Jewish Doctor, who not only happens to be short but also knee-deep in debt? You can’t help who you love, they say. No kidding! And you know how it went down? I don’t think it’ll be a surprise for you to know that the moment she fell in love with him was the moment he “rescued” her. That’s right. Sex and the City has mentioned it as well – “At the end of the day, women just want to be rescued”
Don’t even try to get all feminist on me. If you wanna be a female lumberjack who “needs no man”, all the power to you. Go ahead, dye your hair purple, participate in a “peaceful” protest you know nothing about, and flash your titties. You’re not the type of “woman” I’m referring to anyway, so you’re “safe”. You can even slap on a safety pin on your T-shirt to let us know who you are if it wasn’t obvious already; I’ll allow it/ nobody cares. - RACISM.
(Girlfriends) walk into their usual Cafe and OMG, their usual table is taken by four other women. How dare they? After a little bit of back and forth, they give up and go somewhere else. Nobody cares about bitches being bitches anyway.
Let’s fast forward to when they walk into the same Cafe and there are four Police Officers sitting at their usual table…
Toni: Hey look! There’s a bunch of black folks outside minding their own business!!
Insert Dramatic Pause Here…
NOTHING HAPPENS.
One moment, here you are, trying to stir shit up by “jokingly” hoping that the cops would get up and go see what the fake fuss with black people outside is all about. Next moment, you’re sitting at a different table, pouting that your plan didn’t work. The world is still turning. BECAUSE you’re a customer and your rights are equal to those of another customer; and nobody gives a shit about PEOPLE minding their own business.
Can we get a round of applause for the creator of the show? How brilliantly accurate and utterly hilarious is this scene? It’s no secret that many are under the impression that Today, black people are constantly harassed by the cops for no reason whatsoever. This just goes to show that that notion is completely asinine. Racism wasn’t a thing in America twenty years ago and it certainly isn’t a thing now.
BONUS ROUND:
When you start thinking you’re “all that”, you seem to get lost on the concept of boundaries. Maya certainly did when she pitched her book idea to a client of a lawyer she was working for, as an assistant. Naturally, the dude schooled her for being inappropriate; leaving her with “You can’t keep the dream alive, acting like a nightmare”.
LET THAT SINK IN, next time you decide to attend a “peaceful” protest with an MLK quote on your cardboard poster, as the buildigs are burning behind you.
Girlfriends.
